"Please state your name to introduce yourself to the group"

My last name is Control. No, my first name ain’t baby. It’s Sarah… Ms. Hinton if ya nasty.

Keeping the details light, I have attended several meetings (with the same people—give or take a couple of goons) in which introductions and the always-popular icebreakers are relied on to pierce the juggernaut of awkward silence. In these meetings, announcing a fun fact seems to be a prevalent choice among the sundry of icebreakers. Now, my concern is not why we’re continuing to introduce ourselves to one another. I’m more concerned about the number of freaking fun facts I need to conjure up for this shiz! It’s twisted. I didn’t realize in the job requirements it stated that a valued employee kept a fun fact in her back pocket. Yeesh, I’m not that fun. What’s worse, I don’t want these jokers knowing this much about me! I gotta keep dem quirks locked down, okayyyy. We’re acquaintances… Let’s keep it that way!