It's jealousy but don't tell anyone!

Today power-hungry (or is it just hungry?) Oprah pityingly revealed another one of her secrets of the world that she hides in her inflated hair, which is filled with secrets. Filled! I would tell you, but I’m trying to collect my own secrets to form a kind of repertoire, if you will, so I too can benefit from the wonders of voluminous hair. By the end of summer, I hope to have the most grandiose hair and credit it, not to the vengeful humidity, but to my proliferated secrets. Pinky will ask me what we're doing tonight, to which I will respond: the same thing we do every night, Pinky, try and take over the world!!! With Oprah’s hair, there’d be no stopping me!